BOO :)

i missed this shit.. haha!

good thing we're bestfriends now.. no more fights and the like..
so definitely, much happier..

labyou boo.. mwacs! XD

I JUST...

i just got tired of being fuckin too good.. :|

gudnyt guys.. that line says it all..

HAPPY, FINALLY.. :)

hmm.. after almost a month, this was the only time that ive felt real happiness again..
grabe nakakamiss.. haha!

had swimming with high school friends.. gulo namen sobra.. haha..
gumugulong lahat sa laseng eh.. XD

tapos ive been with kath den.. hehe sumama xa.. aun..
xa nagprovide nung lecheng antonov vodka na nakakamatay! wag kayo iinom non mamamatay kayo promise.. wahaha.. 2 shots pa lang buang na ko.. hahaha..

aun, xmpre food galore.. inom.. kwento..
and finally nakapagusap na den kami maayos..

super happy kase nakasama ko xa ulit, nakakamiss ng bonggang bongga! haha..
happy kase nadinig ko na den yung side niya and i was able to get things more clearly na..

she never changed, super lambing pa din.. :)
naimbyerna lang talaga ng bongga saken kaya aun sinapian na.. HAHA!

happy kase were friends.. :)

hmm, alam ko naman mababasa mo toh katherine.. haha..
aun just wanna say thank you lang den.. for all the lessons that ive learned from you and sa lahat ng makukulit na memories naten together.. hehe..

basta, masaya ko.. :D

IT'S ABOUT THAT 4-LETTER WORD AGAIN

I was thinking about the text message I have received this morning. It read,

A man once asked, “What is more important, to love or to be loved?”

The other man replied, “Which is more important to the bird, its left wing or its right wing?”

Get the point?

Some people just settle loving someone without the person they love knowing it. Well, I don’t see it as a noble act. By the way things are, I think it’s not bravery but cowardice. The person is too afraid to be rejected. In whatever situation the two people involved are in, it’s always better to let the person you love know about how you feel about her. At least, the person will have an idea about what you truly feel. If she will stay away from you after you have confessed, then you must accept it whole heartedly. Respect her decision. Maybe she isn’t really the one for you. If she had fallen for someone else already, tell her still. It’s, anyway, up to her whether to still make friends with you or not. If ever the person stays, then keep her, take care of her, love her, respect her, and don’t hurt her. You must never waste an opportunity that life presents you because it will never be the same the next day. Life is like a river, it never ceases to flow and it will never be the same water. Everyday is a constant, never-ending change. If you die tomorrow, you will never worry because you have told the person already. Tell her while you still can.

Some say that the question isn’t “When will my heart talk?” but it’s “Will you listen?”

You will never know the answer until you try.

In a relationship, it must be 2 way process – a give and take. If it is important to love, it is also important to know that you are being loved. Why? It affects us as persons. If we think that we’re not being loved, if we feel that we’re being taken for granted, then we think of ourselves as less important. If we think this way, we don’t care if someone steps on our pride and dignity. If we feel this way, we become impulsive by how we decide on things. For example, if you have found someone who gave you much attention than the others, you will right then and there fall for this person even if there is still so much to know about him. If this person has hurt you, you don’t give a damn. You just let things to be the way they are because you’re too scared that this person will abandon you and you’ll get back to your dead life with no one to turn to. It is not enough that he stays with you, what is enough is when he really shows you how much he loves you.

If someone loves you, appreciate this person. You may not love him as much as he does but at least be a friend. You must be thankful that someone loves you, in return, love this person, it may be in a different degree, but love him.

Remember, it’s not about being loved, it also learning and showing love.

TALK LESS AND LISTEN MORE

It’s been a while since i gave a real smile to anyone and to not force my laughter.

i forgot how it felt being happy, until now

i have realized that

HAPPINESS is always A CHOICE,

it is not determined by FATE.

I believed before that being on top was everything, but it isn’t. At the end of the day you’ll realize that it’s not about winning that matters, it’s about learning from every defeat. Life is not about who talks the loudest, but who talks with sense. It’s not about how successful you are in the career you choose, but how many lives you have touched and what differences you have made in their lives.

we must TALK LESS

and LISTEN MORE.

that’s why God gave us Two Ears and 1 Mouth.

LAST NA! PROMISE! :))

bat ganto tong blogger na toh? mali ung time and date amf..

pano ba iupdate or baguhin un? wahaha.. sorry na.. XD

tulog na ko! foreals and fosho na toh.. grabe na eye bags ko haha.. gudnyt! :D

04-06-09

it's 2:30 in the morning.. hmm, ive said on my previous post na that would be the last one for tonight kaso hindi ko mapigilan sarili kong mag post.. haha.. anyway, it's morning naman na.. haha!

speaking of morning eh today is April 6, 2009.. it was supposed to be our 15th monthsarry.. HAHA!
wala lang naalala ko lang.. haha..

nako, mababasa nia toh kase she's following my blogs den although she doesnt have any account here in blogger.. *HI! hahaha.. :D

aun, haha.. nawala ako.. hahaha.. leche.. :))

kakatapos ko lang gawin ung banner ko for this.. so aun kaya den ako napuyat.. hehe..

im currently missing many people right now.. and YOU are definitely one of them..
you strongly know who you are.. i miss you.. :)

SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION

hmm, this is gonna be my last post for tonight.. mejo madami na din ung napost ko for today.. effect nga naman ng boredom.. haha!

i'm still wondering why life is soooo mysterious, oh nabobobo lang talaga ko.. HAHA!

people are just naturally unfair.. today, both of you agree on a certain thing..
then on the next day, you will just see yourself on one ccorner crying because you were left alone and hanging.. haaaay..

anyway that's just a part of it.. all of us have so much more to live for..
especially if you are one of those who are capable of so many things.. ehem.. HAHA! kidding.. XD

i super enjoy the time that i spend now with my friends.. ngayon ko lang den narealize na sobrang namiss ko ganitong buhay.. tara gimmick! :D

nga pala.. i will be here in the country for a year na lang.. so sana masulit ko un guys with all of you.. i'll be staying in Australia na for good.. goodluck sating lahat! gumraduate sana tayo! hahaha.. gudnyt everyone.. mmuahh.. :D

COFFEE, BERKS!

Today I learned...

Coffee was once forbidden by Christian priests! Once upon a time, pinagbawalan daw ng mga priests sa Rome ang pag-inom ng kape dahil inisip nilang "drink of the devil" daw to.. Kung sanctified daw ang wine at ginagamit sa Holy Communion, at ang coffee ay pwedeng non-sanctified substitute sa wine at mas nakakabaliw daw ng utak ang kape (hindi pa nila dati naiintindihan ang effects ng caffeine), drink of the 'anti-Christ' daw to!

UNTIL finally, sa mga taong 1500s, inaral at tinikman ni Pope Clement VIII ang controversial na "anti-Christ coffee brew." Nasarapan siguro sya because he decided na hindi na dapat ipag-bawal ang coffee dahil hindi naman sinful ito. Agad niyang ni-bless at na-baptize ang coffee!

So dahil sa pag bless ng coffee para sa everyday consumption, ever since then ay naging mas-informed tayo about coffee at okay na mostly sa Christian world ang pag-inom nito.. :)

May religious history din pala ang kape, diba?

I also learned that...

The first coffee tree in the Philippines was planted in Lipa.
The ''coffee capital'' of the Philippines is the city of Amadeo.

Thanks to KAPE NI JUAN website http://www.kapenijuan.com for the information!


Coffee drinker ba kayo?
Meron kasing mas nakaka-focus naman with tea.. :)

WHY AM I FEELIN THIS? :))

this is actually one of my older posts in multiply..
i just wanna share it with you guys.. mejo natatawa pa din kase ako pag nababasa ko toh.. haha! puro kalokohan.. XD

whew..

after a long time of not posting things eh am gonna stretch my cerebral muscles again, obviously, through this shit blog in here.. *cheese, i really hate writing.. HAHA.. ^_^


so, how are you guys?..
*damn, wish anyone would be interested in reading this shit.. haha..

well.. ako, eto..

medyo balisa.. i dont know if this was just an effect of the THINGS that i did last december 27.. HAHA! *close friends lang nakakalam non.. right che?.. wahahaha..

or, if this has somethin to do with my feelings..
my feelings for "THIS PERSON" *wont name names, am sorry.. ^_^

alright.. i met "THIS PERSON" through a friend..

first, i saw "THIS PERSON's" pictures on one of mah friend's albums here in multiply.. after goin over that album, i posted a comment right away.. "pakilala mo ko jan".. *hindi pa din talaga ko nagbabago.. haha.. ^_^

then, my friend gave me "THIS PERSON's" digits and we were able to talk na den and became FRIENDS..

we used to hangout, i was also able to visit "THIS PERSON" at "THIS PERSON's" house..

"THIS PERSON" beck then, always used to call me up at our house..
magkatext na, tumatawag pa..

eventually, we became closer and closer until weve reached the point na naglalabasan na kame ng sama ng loob sa isa't isa.. "SA ISA'T ISA??"

yeahh, i know you wonder.. haha..

eversince weve known each other, "THIS PERSON" was aware na that i was indeed atrracted to "THIS PERSON".. eh kaso, "THIS PERSON" was still in a relationship so, ok.. i thought it was hanggang dun na lang.. ok.. *sigh..

kaso, when "THIS PERSON" started the "kwentos" na about the partner,
medyo nagkalakas ako ng loob kase, napaka walang kwenta nung partner niya.. AS IN..
if you would just hear "THIS PERSON's" stories, baka mapatay mo ung partner nia.. haaaay!
ewan ko ah! pero i guess sakin lang yon kase nga, gusto ko siya..


dumating pa sa point na, ayan na, it's as if makukuha ko na xa..
the thing that ive been waiting for was parang nasa harap ko na.. all that i have to do was to grab it na lang sana..

kaso, ewan ko ba, hanggang ngayon, napakagulo ko pa din..

suddenly, AYOKO na.. hahahahaha..


bakit?.. bakit kaya ako ganito?.. lagi na lang akong nagha-hang ng tao.. shit, am sooo bad.. huhu.. pero, "THIS PERSON" looks fine naman so, hindi na din ako gnon kaapektado..

eto ngayon ang tanong...

bigla nga lang ba kong umayaw or was it because i have "SOMEONE" na with me but it's just that hindi ako aware na gusto ko xa, na gusto namin ang isa't-isa, na MAHAL namin actually ang isa't-isa?? whaaaaaaaa.. CONFUSION comes along.. fuck..

putangina.. ang gulo promise..
if ever man kase na tama tong hinala ko, AYOKO.. mehn.. ayaw ayaw ayaw..
hindi pwede.. sayang FRIENDSHIP.. whaaaaaa..

CHIO, kasalanan mo toh.. "Mahal ka ni ----- noh?"

ayan.. haup! nagulo ako sa sinabi mo.. bwahahahahahaha..

I BADLY NEED YOUR COMMENTS GUYS.. especially chio and cheche.. haha..

hindi naman ako totally nabubuang dahil dito pero naiisip ko din toh kahit pano..
basta! kahit ano pa man ung totoo behind EVERYTHING, masaya pa din ako..

may magbago man for the better or wala, everything will still be the same.. whew..! ^_^

hindi talaga ko naglagay ng PRONOUN.. pansin mo?.. hahahahaha.. =]]

"LOVE YOURSELF"

hated it. i hated hearing this so much, i forgot what it meant.

thank you, kath, for being the first one to set me back on track. thank you, mom, for confirming that this was something i really needed to take seriously. surprised me to think that somehow, i managed to ignore the real meaning of loving your - SELF. too many people are allowed the power to manipulate this part of us that is the point of life, after all. how does it happen?

selfish, egoistic, self-glorifying. words all too commonly designed to hit you where pushing & pulling never stops until it hurts. i've been a bitch for what i do, a bitch for what i don't do, and when i happen to be learning the ropes from in-between, well then i'm just a bitch for not knowing which direction to go, or what the hell i want to do.

well, apparently, things could get worse. because life becomes a plain fuckin pain when you start looking at things from 'their' point of view.

if this happens to you, you'll find that you're scared to be good at what you love most. you're scared to be good to WHOM you love the most. unless you've got some concept of hope and manage to get sense knocked into your head by some force of nature that pulls you back to what you know, then you'll probably never stop wondering why you're not the same. why crashing feels so familiar to you, why understanding melancholy is too easy to do, why the existence of Love beyond science seems harder to prove.

"Love yourself" is not a command to throw away like a song you're done with after playing it in your head for so long... it's not something you change your mind about if people begin to label it as something it isn't made to be.

Loving yourself is believing that it is okay to like the great and crazy things others like about you, or that you are someone who has friends who love you, even if you don't know why. noone is perfect, and noone should feel, or be, alone.

it's knowing that it is okay to want to be one of the best, if not just better, at that thing you do, JUST BECAUSE. it is happier to dwell on the good things to know what to make of the bad. shoot for the moon.

it is okay to jump at opportunities, because it is okay to be grateful and it is okay, if not better, to make use of what you have. there is always, ALWAYS, a reason for everything.

if you have a life that makes you want to bounce all the blessings back, it is okay to know in your heart that, one day, you will give everything back.

noone should ever have the power to pressure you to do, or be, something that you aren't ready - nor made - to do, or be. one thing i want to say about the life is that, people forget that none of us have anything to do with what our faces or bodies look like, pretty or ugly, bought or born with-- this should be reason enough not to base your work, or your life, on your looks.

there is a bigger picture in the world for each one of us & we are all specks of dust in the end. what you do with your life now can outlast you later on.

it is also okay to smile (maybe even so randomly, you'd seem to be on E) -- it is okay to admit you just honestly like being in this twisted world, no matter how cruel, judgemental, angry, or dangerous it can be.

it took me 3 years of gradually losing that strength. a year and a half to slowly gain it back, and 5 months to finally feel it creeping back into me.

so you think you love yourself. but still somewhat believe that all the countless times you fucked up serve as an estimate of who you are in all your years of being... if you think you do love yourself, but fail to ignore the things that you know exist to try and screw you over... then please, love yourself a little bit more. Messing up is NOT equivalent to BEING all messed up. you have every right and reason to LOVE, EVEN if you don't know why.


Loving that one person, loving anyone, and especially loving yourself, is not anything that LOVE is NOT.


and you know what? if you find Love, there's your God..

I THINK IM GONNA BARF

the feeling of doubting someone is so disgusting that it makes me want to vomit all day.. what's much worse is that you're doubting basing on your instincts, no solid proof for your doubts..

then they laugh.. laugh at your face for feeling that way.. saying its just your instincts, what matters is whats really happening..

its hard to be so distant.. the thing that you'll be believing are those that comes out of their mouths.. and what is left? understanding.. or else you'll be crippled by all your doubts.. and lose the battle..

patience, patience, give them the benefit of the doubt..
STILL i wanna barf it all out..

HOPELESS ROMANTIC

i can't believe im saying things like these again.. haha.. i became yet again another hopeless romantic.. i've always thought of how would i define love to it's truest sense.. and eversince my definition was always the same.. never changed a bit..

it's like drowning for me.. YOU step into the waters without knowing what you're getting yourself into, you keep going on deeper and deeper then finally when you've consumed the last molecule of oxygen you have, the only choice is for you to go back above the water and gasp for air.. you try to, but you can't anymore.. you're just stuck there.. wait until you die in the pool of love you've submerged yourself into..

after all it's your choice.. it's giving your 100%.. not leaving anything.. i know it's dumb, but reality sucks and that's whats going to happen whether you like it or not..

eventhough the person you love, inflicted the worst pain on you, the feeling doesn't go away.. kahit 1 million times ka pang saktan.. though everyone has their saturation points, it would take a very loooonng time before you actually reach these points..

well, that's from my point of view, i don't really know or care about yours.. haha..